Yes, I have performed even in a temple. Basically, there is a big difference between dancing in a Sabha and in a temple. In a temple, we have to dance in the open. Normally, whenever I practise in my dance class, I make it a point to switch off all the fans. But if I have to stage a performance in a temple, I have to switch on all the fans and practise. Why? Because I have to build up my stamina. That’s why. The dancer will feel tired very quickly when she dances in the open. And there will be halogen lights around us – so we will perspire a lot while dancing.
Even here there is a lot of protocol. The management of the temple must agree to host such performances. If they do, good for us because we get an opportunity to perform. They put up a notice several days before the performance. And I feel that in a temple, we get at least a few people who appreciate the performance even if it only for a few minutes.
There is no doubt about it. The energy within the temple performance is definitely beautiful – so very different from dancing in an auditorium or a sabha. I feel as if I am dancing for a divine higher power.
Yes, it was a solo performance – something I always yearn for. Of course, it is not easy to play so many different characters in a solo performance. The devotion of Prahalad is different from the arrogance of Hiranyakashipu or the wrath of Narasimha. It requires hours and hours of practice to get into the skin of the character. During the performance, we have no time to dwell on the emotions of anyone character for long – because we have to move seamlessly into the role of the next character.
So, one way of looking at it is – we can easily attach and detach ourselves from our emotions and roles on stage and bounce back to normal. Or we can even look at it this way – that we have not evolved to that level of perfection as yet that we become Narasimha or Hiranyakashipu or Prahalad – when we dance their roles. So there is always room for improvement. It depends on your perception. But yes, it does take a toll on our emotions. We do feel drained but very happy too after a stage performance. It is a different feeling altogether and something worth experiencing.
Yes, I know temple authorities should host more such performances to encourage us. After all, it was the Devadasis who used to dance centuries ago, isn’t it? They all lived in temples. And they all had a lot of gold and silver with them. So they could pursue their passion for dancing to the fullest. It’s good to know that some schools in the north invite a team of professional dancers to perform during Navratri. But such concepts may work only in North India.
In South India, you will find a dance class on every street corner. And almost all schools will have their dance teachers too. I like teaching in my guru’s dance academy because only genuinely interested students will join the classes. In a school, however, all students may not be interested no?
No. Absolutely not. I will say a big No if someone asks me to perform in a shopping mall. Yes, I know they host all kinds of shows in malls too these days. But most of them will be western dances. Bharat Natyam is rooted in our culture. As a dancer, I am able to tune into the energy that is radiated from the space in which I am going to perform. That space becomes very sacred while we perform. At least I feel so.
Yes, we can feel the energy. It is different in auditoriums and temples. But the energy there is good. I honestly don’t think I can tune into that kind of energy in a mall. All that depends on the person who is performing too, isn’t it? If someone else is comfortable with staging a Bharat Natyam performance in a mall, she can do so. I wouldn’t be able to do that. And I can only speak for myself, No?
Basically, Bharat Natyam is not a casual dance form where you can freely express yourself. It is a disciplined art form in which every gesture, eye movement and pose is conveying a subtle message to the audience. We are telling them a story and taking the audience through each bhava of the story. Bharat Natyam is full of rasa. It also has a strong structure. No – I can never even imagine doing Bharat Natyam in a mall. That is for sure.
Of course – people do bitch about one another even in our dance class. They will feel the guru is not appreciative enough of their efforts or is partial to someone else or did not give them the opportunity of staging a solo performance even though they deserved it. It happens here too.
At such times, the only question I ask myself is – are they practising Bharat Natyam for name and fame or because they are passionate about dancing? The guru is the best judge. No? If she does not give us an opportunity or corrects us or shouts at us – she does so only because she wants us to improve and perfect our steps.
I may yearn to stage a solo performance. But am I fit enough to do so? Have I mastered my steps perfectly? No. The guru knows all this. So instead of focussing on perfecting our steps, why do we get offended when she selects someone else for the performance?
Our guru is a wonderful person. She rarely loses her temper. Ah. Yes. You are right. We do learn to be very patient too when we pursue our passion. I think we both missed out on that point in the earlier part of our conversation. Yes, sometimes she does stage a show in her company.
But all in all, our passions express our undiluted love for art. And while it is good to earn a little something on the side, I doubt if we can ever commercialize any art form.
If I could change just one thing in the field of art- yes not only in dance or Bharat Natyam – it would be this – a little more respect, some acknowledgement for our efforts and a few words of appreciation….if the audience gives me just a little bit of their wholehearted attention – I will willingly dance again and again for them with Bhakti in my heart. That much I am very sure of. Yes, some applause would be welcome too.