Namaskar. I am Foram. A few years back, I was a young girl. A daughter. A sister. And a cousin. Today, I am a woman, a wife and mother too. As a young girl and even as a woman, I had my fair share of dreams. Who doesn’t? And it’s not a crime to have dreams, is it? But what I realized during this phase of my life is that it takes a lot of effort, passion, dedication and patience to realize each dream of ours. And that is the journey I wish to share with all of you today.
I belong to a middle-class family. But we believe in lofty ideals. My father was bedridden for 35 years. Yes, 35 years. He passed away a couple of years back. I lost my mother around 16 years back. My younger brother was in the first year of college at that time. But you know what? My mother always had a peaceful expression on her face despite all the challenges that she was facing.
She worked from dawn to dusk, took care of our home and all of us too. And in her free time, she stitched falls for sarees, did Piko and made hairclips, buckles and rubber bands to earn some money. My mother would always say, “Foram, learn these crafts. They will prove to be useful to you in your life. You can lead an independent life if you master these skills.” I never understood the gravity of her words at that time. I was young after all. But I’m glad I listened to her and learnt all those skills from her.
Today, I spend all my free time creating lovely handicrafts. I know how to embroider, crochet, make flowers out of organza and make diyas and rangolis only because my mother had the foresight to teach me all these skills. She didn’t just teach me these skills. She created an interest and passion for such things within me. And if today, I enjoy working on my handicrafts, the credit goes entirely to my mother. Yes, she also taught me how to cook.
Financially? My uncle helped us a lot. And my mother earned quite a bit too. So that was our biggest blessing. You know, I was quite reserved when I was in school and college. I would go to college and come back home. Straight away. I never mingled with others or talked much with my friends.
I have a degree in commerce. So after I graduated I started working in the accounts department of a reputed firm. You know how it is to work for others, don’t you? There was a lot of pressure and quite a bit of politics within the firm. I would come home every day and discuss all that happened in the office with my father and brother. Initially, if my boss or my colleagues criticized me or talked about me behind my back, I would come home and cry.
And to be honest, I am quite emotional too. At such times my father and brother would say, “When you work for others, such things are bound to happen. Leave the issues that you face in your workspace there itself. Don’t bring them home. Focus on the work that you have to do. Refrain from getting embroiled in the internal politics of your workspace. Only then can you strike a balance in your life.”
My father’s advice helped me. A lot. After that, I started sharing my thoughts with my friends, colleagues and seniors. I became receptive to their views too. And slowly, I started enjoying my work and loved working as a team with all my colleagues. But I followed my father’s sage advice at all times.
You won’t believe this. But it is true. I was even given the ‘Best employee award’ twice. Naturally, I was quite elated. I could feel the change in my own character. I bought my first mobile phone – a simple one- with that money. I still have that phone with me. It symbolises my internal transformation.
Sometimes people ask me why I still have such an old phone with me. And I just smile at them…..and thank my parents and my brother for the value that they have passed on to me.
It was at this time that my mother passed away. It was a terrible blow for all of us. And suddenly the responsibility of running our home landed on my shoulders. But my mother had trained me well. All the skills that she had taught me and all her efforts to make me independent proved to be invaluable blessings to me now.
I mean if you are willing to work hard, are confident about yourself, have faith in your ability and skills and pray with Bhakti and Shraddha, all our challenges melt away, don’t they? Yes, a few years later I did get married to a wonderful man too and am a mother of a 3-year-old boy now. And in all these years, this is what I have understood.
We need to be flexible with our dreams too. Also, the kind of journey we embark upon to fulfil our dreams too is very important. No? Sometimes we need to put them on the back burner and completely forget about them for a while. And often with time, our dreams, goals and ambitions too change, don’t they? Sometimes we need to sacrifice them though our dream is very very close to our heart. That’s life, isn’t it?
But somewhere, sometime, somehow….we will intuitively pursue what is close to our heart. It comes naturally to us. All of us. We just get the urge to fulfil at least one dream of ours. And then find the time, create space and get the energy to realize it. That is the kind of ardour we all have within us for our dreams. And that is what makes it all worth our while. Yes, all our journeys are unique. And we can all learn so much from one another’s journeys.
I’m Foram. I have shared the journey of a part of my life with all of you and hope – very sincerely- that you too will find something worth your while here just like I have. I have created several handicrafts and they are all up on display on this blog. Please click here to get a glimpse of them.